When I was going through my training, I remember my instructor talking about owning my power. Looking back at that time, where I was in my life, I understood it…to a certain point. I’ve learned a lot about owning my own power these last six years. My understanding of it has gone from mostly thinking about it to more feeling it. My Spirit team has been an important part of this. They have been helping me understand ways to own my power. It doesn’t require sitting on a mountain top in the lotus position chanting Ohm. It’s simpler than I thought!

Owning your power and empowerment, what does that mean? The way I keep seeing it is like stepping into your Divine shoes – that awareness that you are more than what you see in the mirror. At first, it’s like a child putting on their parent’s shoes. They’re too big and the child’s foot is slipping out as they clumsily try to walk in them. As your awareness increases, you grow into those shoes, walk more confidently and feel comfortable in them. You understand that you are an infinite being, you are an extension of the Divine, all powerful. You love and accept yourself. You see life as an opportunity to grow and expand your awareness. You understand that you are the creator of your reality and live that truth with your thoughts, words and actions. You know that you have all the answers within you and simply have to turn within to access them. That in turn means that you know you can handle anything that comes your way. Fear and doubt decrease. You understand that you empower yourself, it doesn’t come from someone else. You also know that owning your power benefits everyone and if everyone did the same, conflict and drama couldn’t exist.

As I’m on this journey, I have run into beliefs I’ve been holding on to that aren’t serving me well- that owning my power means running all over people, being aggressive, being domineering and as a female being a b*tch. I’ve been releasing those old beliefs and replacing them with ones that help me in owning my power rather than hinder it. True power doesn’t mean overpowering others or being mean. And it doesn’t make a woman a b*tch. You can own your power in a loving and compassionate way, while honoring the Divine within you and others.

Another thing that happened was shifts in relationships. When you don’t own your power, you compromise yourself and allow others to have control over you to varying degrees. It sets up patterns between you. When you then start owning your power, some people don’t respond well to it. It shakes up some relationships. It can be a difficult and emotional time as the shifts happen and the dust settles. The thing I found is, the people who reacted negatively were usually the ones I had the most unhealthy relationships with in the first place. Most of them ended up fading away. And the remaining relationships? Well they had something good going on, because my making a shift didn’t cause problems. It strengthened the relationship or made it healthier. I found that the people who really love me supported me because they could tell I was in a better place. I’m also finding that I have become more discerning when it comes to starting new relationships and who I let into my life. I’m not willing to deal with the drama and conflict that I did in the past.

One more part of the empowerment puzzle I discovered is being aware of how I feel in situations, relationships and environments. When I’m not owning my power, it feels outright crappy! For me, I feel like a little girl back in third grade who was scared, unsure, shy and didn’t speak up for herself. Sometimes my stomach tightens up, I have something happen in my neck or things feel off to me. I started paying attention to those signs. It’s been a process for me of what to do when I get them. I’m learning to stay calm, breathe and turn within. By doing that, it helps me see the bigger picture, stay open to receiving guidance from Spirit and be more mindful of what I’m getting intuitively. On the flip side, when I am owning my power, I feel amazing and energized! That’s the difference. Not owning your power feels restrictive, like a bird in a cage. Owning your power feels expansive, like an eagle soaring on the wind.

With the help and guidance of Spirit, I have been making changes and feel more empowered. That little third grade girl feeling hasn’t happened for a couple years. I feel more comfortable and confident in my own skin. It’s like I’m really hitting my stride. Feeling this empowered has led me to make some more shifts in my life, most notably:

• Not identifying simply with my physical body – I am bigger and more powerful than what I see in the mirror
• Learning to relax and not sweat the small stuff
• Getting happy, laughing more and finding ways to bring more joy in my life
• Simplifying things
• Loving and accepting myself more
• No rules
• Expressing my emotions more

I’ll share more about this list in the next post.